Alter Your Attitude to Change Your Circumstances
Reframing Your Experiences
Taking charge of your attitude often means that you have to "re-frame" experiences. Reframing is changing the way you look at an experience. Joan viewed her experiences through the frame of "It will never work, so there's no point in trying." Had she instead been seeing the unreturned phone calls through a frame of "I may have to work at this awhile before I succeed," she would have called back or contacted additional people. A negative frame on our experiences and life will hold us back, while a positive frame will motivate us to keep going until we accomplish our goals.
A positive frame on life doesn't "just happen," however. We have to create it intentionally on a daily basis. Developing a positive, optimistic attitude is challenging. We have to work at monitoring and changing our self-talk, and may have to re-frame how we see ourselves as well our perceptions of past, present and future events in our lives. We do have the power to change our lives by changing our thinking.
Each of us is the most limiting factor in our own lives. We will only attempt what we believe is possible. What we do in our lives-or don't do-is a reflection not only of our self-image but also of our faith in God. Shallow faith produces limited results; deep faith produces miracles. No matter what has happened in the past or what weaknesses we may have, God is greater. Neither our past nor our present hampers God. The opinions and perspective of the other people in our lives do not affect or limit God. He can transform and empower you to accomplish everything he calls you to do.
Calling Catalysts for Taking Charge of Your Attitude
More than anything else, your attitude-how you think-will impact how far you go in discovering and living your calling. Our book, Live Your Calling, contains several "calling catalyst" strategies to help you enlarge your faith, change your thinking and live your calling. Here are two of them:
Exchange limiting "self-talk" and "frames" for motivating messages and positive views on life. We choose how we think and see the world. The Apostle Paul illustrates this truth when he exhorts us to choose to rejoice always; to pray with thanksgiving rather than choose to be anxious; and to choose to think about things that are excellent or praiseworthy (Phil. 4:4-9). Ultimately, the power to think positively comes from having faith in the One with whom all things are possible (Phil. 4:13).
Intentionally work on changing any "limited thinking" habits you have developed. They won't change by themselves. To get rid of a bad habit, you have to replace it with a good habit. For example:
•Ask yourself "How CAN I...?" instead of thinking "I CAN'T..."
•Ask "In what ways CAN I make this work?" instead of "It will NEVER work."
•Respond with "Let's figure out how I/we CAN make this happen!" instead of "Yes, BUT (here are all the reasons I can't do this thing)."
Trying to think this way may feel very foreign to you, especially if you have well-developed negative thinking habits. You can make major progress just by taking sports psychologist Bob Rotella's advice: "If you don't want to get into positive thinking, that's OK. Just eliminate all the negative thoughts from your mind, and whatever's left will be fine!"
Choosing to see the positive in ourselves and in the life situations we encounter comes down to a matter of faith. For Christians, our optimism is founded on trusting that God is in control, and regardless of how bleak or hopeless circumstances seem to be, He is using them for our good and His glory.
Kevin Brennfleck and Kay Marie Brennfleck, National Certified Career Counselors, are the authors of Live Your Calling: A Practical Guide to Finding and Fulfilling Your Mission in Life. Their websites, www.ChristianCareerCenter.com, www.ChurchJobsOnline.com, and www.ChristianJobFair.com, feature hundreds of job listings from churches, ministries, and Christian employers; a resume bank; and many other career/job search resources and articles. They also offer career coaching and testing to help you discover work that fits your God-given design, as well as assistance with writing a powerful resume, interviewing effectively, finding job openings, and other aspects of a successful job search. You can schedule a free consultation session today!
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